The Broom Tree

Within the story of “The Tale of Genji” in chapter two titled “The Broom Tree” the focus of discussion weighs heavily on women from Genji’s, Chujo’s, a guard’s officer, and a functionary in the ministry of rites point of view. They mention everything from what they personally look for in a wife from rank, beauty, behavior and even qualifications they should have.

The humorous part of the story to me is that it reminded me of a bunch of women talking about men. Trying to see if there was a specific way to tell if a man would make a great husband, father and provider or not.  Yet as men they seemed more concerned about the qualifications of running their home, as mentioned, “But when it comes to choosing the woman who is to be in charge of your house, the qualifications are altogether too many.” This idea of a woman running a home is mentioned several times in the story.

Furthermore they all go back and forth on which rank of women is better than another, from high to low class. Yet they all seem to desire a few things in common a “beautiful and charming woman, one that does not require shaping or training, yet soft and feminine with this combination all tied into one person.” That seemed a little unrealistic to desire such a combination in one woman but not impossible to find. However, I believe the chances of finding such a woman are entirely narrowed down to slim pickings. There is another part of their discussion that really bothered me, it focused on what they believed to be ideals of how a woman should behave to keep a man interested so he would stay around or stay “faithful” meaning that he would return more frequently with visits than not.

Some of their perspective are mentioned such as, “If she is a jealous type you may remember her or may lose interest over time, if is she is skilled but not skilled enough she may not be of good use, if she lacks jealousy she may have another man on the side which over time one would lose interest in her, if she’s stubborn, she may keep one’s interest for a while but if too stubborn one may go the other way.” It’s amazing to me that even over time men truly still think this way. They may not actually come out and say it but they definitely think it.

It reminds of playing the “field” in today’s dating world. Through the crazy dance of dating many people at the same time, to then only narrow it down to “THE ONE.” Searching for that one fictitious person that you created in your mind possibly from the time you were a young child, the so called “perfect person.” This man or woman that has all of the qualities that one might be looking for intertwined with other ideas that seem to be perfect for you. However there is a problem with this idealistic search for “perfection” in one person, it doesn’t exist except for in movies. Unfortunately when this “perfect” mate/companion doesn’t come along, there is great sadness and remorse and then the idea of “settling” crosses one’s mind. This is what I call more realistic. It’s not a matter really settling, it’s more of a matter of not putting unrealistic expectation on just one person. Not expecting “perfection” but learning to accept flaws for what they are and learning to appreciate them. Not criticize them. This is part of the beauty of being human. There are no two souls alike.

As I mention this realistic and nonrealistic point of view it brings me back to the end of the chapter where Genji gets tired of “playing” the game and chasing this ideal woman. During his pursuit he used this woman’s younger brother as a messenger boy. He would run back and forth as they would exchange words with each other. Yet, over time Genji became found of this young boy (Her brother)and grew to know and like him. Once Genji got tired of the constant rejection, stubbornness and "chase", Genji ended up settling for her younger brother. (“Well, you at least must not abandon me.” Genji pulled the boy down beside him. The boy was delighted; such were Genji’s youthful charms. Genji, for his part or so one is informed, found the boy more attractive than his chilling sister.”)

Maybe this is why many men from that error had many mistresses. They kept looking for the "one" woman, however, could not find complete happiness with just one, so instead of learning to love just one and be with one person, they tried to fulfill their voids with multiple women, maybe hoping this would create wholeness within their self.